Lying
by ignorethisiwas12
Summary: One lie. One lie was all it took to mould a life. "Watching his nephew cry tore at his soul.. He didn't want to lie to him..."
1. One

**Title:** Lying**  
><strong>**Author: **TinaBanina96**  
><strong>**Summary:** One lie. One lie was all it took to mould a life. "Watching his nephew cry tore at his soul.. He didn't want to lie to him..." Told from Yashamaru's POV. ONESHOT

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><p><strong><span>AN: <span>****Yashamaru is a character who we don't see a lot of, but he was obviously very much a part of Gaara's life. I changed canon ever so slightly at the end. I just really wanted to write this :) Inspired by that one chapter of Naruto (YOU KNOW THE ONE)  
>Please R &amp; R, I will love you forever :D<strong>

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><p><strong><span>Lying – Part One<span>**

The moon was full. It was a quiet night in Sunagakure. Yashamaru leapt over the rooftops in search.

He was reluctant.

The Kazekage had ordered it, a mission to test his youngest son. Yashamaru thought it was wrong. Everything that man did seemed to be wrong. His actions only hurt people.

The night was calm. Yashamaru had no trouble spotting the small, red-headed boy. He was sitting alone, staring at his hands.

Alone. Always alone. Gaara had never had anyone but Yashamaru, and now his father was taking him away too. Yashamaru sighed. The night would be calm no longer.

Yashamaru stopped behind the boy. Hands shaking, he drew out the kunai and threw them. As expected, a wall of sand rose up, defending Gaara's small frame.

Quickly, the child turned around. There was shock evident on his face. His surprised turned quickly to anger.

Yashamaru swiftly drew out more kunai and flung them at his nephew. As soon as the blades left his hands, he knew it wouldn't work. He was glad.

Gaara's sand snaked around Yashamaru's feet. It twisted, surrounded him. Yashamaru was enveloped in it, unable to move or escape.

The child's fists clenched in fury. It crushed Yashamaru's body, breaking bones. When the sand let him go, he collapsed. Lying there, he waited.

His orders had been to corner Gaara psychologically. The Kazekage didn't trust his son. Yashamaru's precious nephew… Yashamaru prepared himself mentally for the completion of this mission.

Gaara's attack had hurt him, but Yashamaru was about to wound Gaara much, much more.

The small child crept closer. Reaching out, Gaara crabbed the cloth covering Yashamaru's face with his small hands.

"Who?… Why?" he stuttered. When he uncovered his assailant, the expression on his face looked like his heart had been ripped out of his body.

Yashamaru smiled a little. It wasn't a pleasant smile, more like a grimace.

"Lord Gaara… Impressive."

Gaara grabbed at his chest, fingers digging into where his heart would be.

"Yashamaru…" he said, wide eyed, afraid.

Yashamaru watched him. He watched his small nephew process the fact that his uncle had just tried to kill him. He saw Gaara start to break, to lose control over the demon inside. The small boy collapsed onto his knees.

"Aaaaagh.. Aaaah…"

The tears streamed from his blue eyes. He grabbed his head, and looked at Yashamaru.

"W-Why? Why…W-why is it? Why you?"

His eyes drove daggers into Yashamaru's. Yashamaru closed his eyes to avoid the look. Gaara sobbed. The sound was heart-wrenching.

"Always… Your were always…Only you were my…" Gaara rubbed his eyes. Yashamaru opened his.

Quietly, he spoke:

"It was an order. I was ordered to assassinate you."

Confusion and shock were evident on the child's face. Yashamaru continued.

"By your father… The Kazekage."

The revelation was too much for Gaara. He moaned in pain.

"Father… Why would he want me dead?"

Yashamaru felt his heart stop for a moment. This was it. He had to tell Gaara the truth.

"You were born to be possessed by the Sand Shukaku. Until today, you have been watched over as an experimental subject."

Yashamaru breathed in. It hurt his chest.

"However, you are yet unable to control the powers of the living spirit Shukaku. Before long your existence will become too dangerous to the village itself. We simply couldn't let that happen."

Yashamaru watched as Gaara lifted his head. a new emotion flickered through Gaara's face. It was hope.

"So, then, you had no choice… It was because of father…" said Gaara, with a small smile.

Watching his nephew cry tore at his soul. He didn't want to lie to him, but he was a shinobi. Lying was part of the job. His next words would hurt Gaara, but he had to deceive him.

"No. You are mistaken."

Gaara's face fell. Yashamaru steeled himself for his next words

"Yes, I did receive Kazekage's orders. But… I would've declined if I wanted to."

Yashamaru stared off into the night sky. He couldn't meet Gaara's gaze, not for this. A soft wind blew, too gentle, too calm for this moment. Yashamaru shuddered. Was he cold? Or was it something else?

"Lord Gaara… Deep down I must have always resented you… coming into this world, stealing life away from my beloved sister."

It wasn't true. It hurt him that he had to say that. He had never hated Gaara. It wasn't his fault that his bastard of a father had sealed the spirit in him.

Gaara had fallen silent. It added to the stillness of the desert. Nothing moved, but the breeze. Yashamaru compelled himself to look at Gaara.

The boy his precious sister had given his life for. Now he was the one that was dying, but not to protect Gaara. His death would only cause Gaara pain.

"I tried my best to love you, by thinking of you as a memento of her…"

That was true. Yashamaru had always loved Gaara. He was all he had left of Karura.

"She never wished to give birth to you. She was sacrificed for the village and therefore died while cursing at it."

Yashamaru wished he could tell Gaara how much his mother had loved him. How her spirit was protecting him at all times. But his orders prevented it. He was the Kazekage's right arm, a ninja of the sand. He had to follow through.

"Perhaps, from that moment. I've been carrying never healing emotional scars…"

Hadn't he told Gaara the same thing only hours earlier?

"Your mother gave you your name. This child's name… is Gaara. A demon that loves only himself. Love only yourself and fight only for your sake. She wished and believed your existence was forever, as long as you did so."

Yashamaru shivered. Yes, it was definitely getting colder.

"But she didn't give you the name out of concern or love for you. The name was given to you in the hope of your eternal existence, to let her grudge be carried down and known to the world."

Blue eyes locked onto gray ones.

"You were never loved."

It was a lie, a terrible, terrible lie. Gaara, Yashamaru thought, do you know how much she loved you? Do you know that she swore always to protect you? My sister… loved you. Please don't believe what I'm saying out loud…

Gaara remained motionless. Yashamaru couldn't read his face.

He didn't have much time left. Gathering his last breaths, Yashamaru turned to Karura's son. His face was stone, emotionless, while anger, pain, regret raged behind his impassive eyes. He was ready for his last lie.

"This is it. Please die."

The words felt wrong. He didn't want to say them, but he had to. He had to make Gaara believe. He knew Karura's love would protect him.

He activated the tags, all the while in grievous pain. Whether it was emotional, or physical, Yashamaru didn't know. He no longer cared.

Is this what you wanted Kazekage? He asked himself. Are you happy now that you've killed my sister, killed me and doomed your son?

The tags fizzled and caught flame. In the split second moment before the tags blew him apart, Yashamaru whispered.

"I'm sorry Gaara."

The soft wind that always blew in Suna lifted the words from him as they passed through his lips. It carried them away from the dead man, never to be heard by the crying boy.


	2. Two

**AN:** ** I've been wanting to write this for a while now. I know I should be finishing LotL, but uuuugh this was on my brain. Enjoy this short ending :)**

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><p><strong>Lying – Part Two<strong>

_**10 Years Later…**_

How many times had he relived those moments? The memory in his mind was like an old movie, starting to fade, yet still relaying the same emotions that had been present at the time of its creation.

Gradually, since he'd fought the remarkable blond boy at the Chunin Exams, Gaara had learnt to do many things. Foremost of all, he'd learnt not to dwell on the negative, on the painful memories in his past, but to instead, forge a brighter future.

But that one memory was somewhere he constantly revisited. To him, it had been more traumatic than being kidnapped by the Akatsuki, or even fighting his father in the war.

Why though? Why did he see those moments in his mind so often? It hadn't been the first lie he'd been told. It certainly wasn't the last. But that lie… had changed him.

Everything in his life had been built upon that one lie. Gaara's entire image of himself, had, for years, been twisted, contorted by his uncle's lie. Only after meeting Naruto, did his warped perception of reality start to change.

Gaara stood alone, surrounded by the sandstone, Suna crest shaped memorials. The graveyard was silent, save for the ever blowing desert wind.

Too many of those headstones and memorials were for Suna ninja. Too many had been lost during the war caused by a single madman.

The battle was over now, and though his village was still in pain, they were also recovering. And now, with the battle over for now, it was his turn to recover too.

His fight with his father during the war had brought many revelations, yet left questions unanswered. He knew now for certain, that he was not a monster. His mother _had _loved him, _had _wanted to protect him. It was his father, not him who was at fault for her death.

The only question left was Yashamaru. How had his uncle fit into all of it? He had been six years old that night when Yashamaru's single lie had changed his world view. It was a monumental lie.

It was strange to think that one singular act could have such great impact. What Yashamaru had done had sent him spiraling out of control, turning him into the monster that everyone had believed him to be.

The monster he believed him to be.

But why had his uncle done it? And… and had he regretted it during his last moments?

For years when he was younger, he had sworn to himself that Yashamaru's last words had been an apology. He had sworn that in the soft desert wind, he'd heard the feminine, almost lilting tones of his mother's brother.

Reality, or the distraught hallucinations of a child?

Gaara sighed, running his hand over a sandy brown headstone, one he had never had the courage, nor the compassion, to visit before.

_Yashamaru – Brother, uncle, shinobi. May the wind carry your faithful spirit onwards towards the beyond._

"Which was it, Uncle?" he whispered, though he knew the rock could not answer. The wind picked up, scattering a light dusting of grainy desert sand over the grave.

Dead men told no tales and answered no questions.

Sometimes though, Gaara wished they could.

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><p><strong>Leave a review for my angst? Please? :3<strong>


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